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mojarras has learned 81 things!
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Now You See Me
The Parisian bank you are planning to rob for 20+ years while doing a magic show in Las Vegas will luckily be physically shipping a fortune in EUROS from Vegas to Paris.
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    Posted, 5th August 2013
    by mojarras
    1
    Fast & Furious 6
    Airport runways are about 20 miles long???
    (2) Comments
    • 20th July 2013 by Creamlord666
      Someone took his time and did the math - the runway in F&F6 must have been 38 miles long!
    • 27th June 2013 by indubitably
      Love this LOL
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    Posted, 7th June 2013
    by mojarras
    7
    Chronicle
    Even when boiling with rage and destroying buildings and stuff, don't forget to film yourself from all angles with all kinds of devices with cameras.
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      Posted, 4th March 2012
      by mojarras
      1
      Chronicle
      If your best friend laughs at you when you fail at sex. Kill him.
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        Posted, 4th March 2012
        by mojarras
        1
        Battle: Los Angeles
        After learning that the way to kill Aliens is by shooting them through the heart, just continue shooting anywhere without aiming.
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          Posted, 23rd March 2011
          by mojarras
          0
          Battle: Los Angeles
          Aliens have really bad aim.
          (2) Comments
          • 11th January 2015 by john2012
            The trained at the Storm trooper school of shooting.
          • 23rd October 2011 by agentdc7
            Bad guys have really bad aim. Always.
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          Posted, 23rd March 2011
          by mojarras
          5
          Rite, The
          Rome is infested with cats.
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            Posted, 18th February 2011
            by mojarras
            0
            Rite, The
            Father Lucas lives in a shit hole.
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              Posted, 18th February 2011
              by mojarras
              0
              Rite, The
              If you are thinking of running away from a funeral home, it is probably best if you become a priest.
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                Posted, 18th February 2011
                by mojarras
                0
                Rite, The
                If you can guess what's in a bag then you are possessed.
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                  Posted, 18th February 2011
                  by mojarras
                  0
                  Rite, The
                  Baal waited forever to give up that easily.
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                    Posted, 18th February 2011
                    by mojarras
                    1
                    Rite, The
                    If you are a skeptic priest, it's OK to stare at hot girls legs.
                    (1) Comments
                    • 28th August 2011 by Alaurien
                      unless..that you just want to break it (like in Willow..the guy was staring the girl's leg..and say "i want to break it")
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                    Posted, 18th February 2011
                    by mojarras
                    0
                    Rite, The
                    Exorcism 101: If you get the demon to tell you his name, you can ask him to leave and he will.
                    (1) Comments
                    • 6th January 2013 by SweetReaper
                      Actually, That statement is fact. Read anything on Exorcisms.
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                    Posted, 18th February 2011
                    by mojarras
                    0
                    Rite, The
                    Think twice when asking a priest to bless your doll, you might get smacked the fuck out!
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                      Posted, 18th February 2011
                      by mojarras
                      2
                      Paranormal Activity 2
                      If you are experiencing some real paranormal crazy shit, your best hope is the nanny you fired.
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                        Posted, 15th February 2011
                        by mojarras
                        2
                        Paranormal Activity 2
                        Driving demons out of homes is a must have skill if you are looking to hire a nanny.
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                          Posted, 15th February 2011
                          by mojarras
                          1
                          Paranormal Activity 2
                          If the nanny you are friends with and spend a lot of time gets fired, don't even say goodbye to her.
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                            Posted, 15th February 2011
                            by mojarras
                            4
                            Paranormal Activity 2
                            Whatever you find first on the internet about demons and haunted houses will immediately apply to your situation.
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                              Posted, 15th February 2011
                              by mojarras
                              4
                              Paranormal Activity 2
                              Be sure to video tape yourself talking about hard childhood moments about you being terrorized by demons, otherwise whoever finds the tapes won't know what's going on.
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                                Posted, 15th February 2011
                                by mojarras
                                4
                                Unstoppable
                                You just can't derail a train going 70MPH. You just can't!
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                                  Posted, 15th January 2011
                                  by mojarras
                                  1
                                  Unstoppable
                                  It's a good idea to shoot at a small red button located next to a fuel tank.
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                                    Posted, 15th January 2011
                                    by mojarras
                                    1
                                    Unstoppable
                                    You have to risk your life and become a hero if you want your wife to talk to you again.
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                                      Posted, 15th January 2011
                                      by mojarras
                                      2
                                      Unstoppable
                                      It is impossible to drop a well-trained guy on a moving train from a helicopter at 60MPH.
                                      (1) Comments
                                      • 18th January 2015 by zikzak393
                                        It isn't any easier at slower speeds.
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                                      Posted, 15th January 2011
                                      by mojarras
                                      1
                                      Ocean's Twelve
                                      Even if you stole the Faberge Egg days before, play along and act as if you haven't stole it yet, even when no bad guys are watching you. It is not a total waste of time.
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                                        Posted, 4th November 2010
                                        by mojarras
                                        1
                                        Butterfly Effect, The
                                        Ashton Kutcher only knew the bad word "fuckbag" when he was a kid.
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                                          Posted, 24th October 2010
                                          by mojarras
                                          1

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