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Chronicle

Chronicle
This list was started on 6th February 2012 by bourbonphantom
There are 43 learnings for this movie
This list was last updated on 21st November 2014

The Things I Learned . . .

1
...Aaaaannnnd of course the black guy dies first.
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    Posted, 16th July 2012
    by yeahright
    6
    2
    After flying unassisted halfway across the globe, it's still important to have an ice axe and climbing rope... Just in case you need to get up to those really hard to reach places.
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    • 22nd May 2012 by Earwacks
      And make sure it's a wood axe...
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    Posted, 11th March 2012
    by Educate
    5
    3
    When you're trying to get a girl to see that you're interested in her, don't look directly at her, and respond to text messages from other people while she's talking to you.
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      Posted, 6th February 2012
      by bourbonphantom
      3
      4
      You can throw cops and SWAT guys around with telekinesis as much as you want, as long as you don't draw a weapon they won't shoot you.
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        Posted, 6th February 2012
        by bourbonphantom
        3
        5
        A firefighter's suit actually does not protect you from fire.
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          Posted, 6th February 2012
          by bourbonphantom
          3
          6
          Sometimes flying up into the clouds to try to calm down your friend just isn't worth it!
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            Posted, 21st May 2012
            by KungFuMasterLarry
            3
            7
            You can totally go about the rest of your schoolday like nothing happened after ripping out someone's teeth in front of a bunch of witnesses.
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              Posted, 6th February 2012
              by bourbonphantom
              2
              8
              If you fail to land a punch, you should fly out the nearest window to acknowledge your defeat.
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                Posted, 6th February 2012
                by bourbonphantom
                2
                9
                WE HAVE SUPERPOWERS! Let's play with legos.
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                  Posted, 23rd June 2012
                  by Max
                  2
                  10
                  Matt's Girlfriend films her front door because everyone does that sort of thing.
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                    Posted, 20th February 2013
                    by Filmguy
                    2
                    11
                    Raves are filled with jealous and violent boyfriends.
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                    • 30th July 2012 by Max
                      And they sound and dress like Rocky
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                    Posted, 6th February 2012
                    by bourbonphantom
                    1
                    12
                    Even after you discover you have incredible super powers that allow you to destroy anyone and anything, you'll still be preoccupied with the tedium of keeping a video camera around to record everything.
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                      Posted, 11th February 2012
                      by bourbonphantom
                      1
                      13
                      Which one has the power to have his Flip Video at just the right time?
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                        Posted, 25th February 2012
                        by jermanyx
                        1
                        14
                        If your best friend laughs at you when you fail at sex. Kill him.
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                          Posted, 4th March 2012
                          by mojarras
                          1
                          15
                          Even when boiling with rage and destroying buildings and stuff, don't forget to film yourself from all angles with all kinds of devices with cameras.
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                            Posted, 4th March 2012
                            by mojarras
                            1
                            16
                            Leaf blowers have more than one use.
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                              Posted, 9th March 2012
                              by Optimus Thunder
                              1
                              17
                              A more appropriate title would have been "Douche Bags With Telekinesis."
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                                Posted, 4th April 2012
                                by Max
                                1
                                18
                                Can't afford your mothers medication? Go rob a different store and some random people using your powers instead of using your powers to steal the medicine when the pharmacist walks away.
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                                  Posted, 23rd June 2012
                                  by tina270
                                  1
                                  19
                                  After witnessing helicopters being thrown about like feathers and people knocked through buildings at the flick of a wrist, every police officer takes cover behind heavy metal vehicles.
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                                    Posted, 15th August 2012
                                    by Swampstealer
                                    1
                                    20
                                    Andrew waits until just after Matt arrives at the hospital before dropping his father, rather than dropping him immediately while there's no one around to save him.
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                                      Posted, 6th February 2012
                                      by bourbonphantom
                                      0
                                      21
                                      Cheerleaders are creeped out by video cameras, not by creepy people staring at them.
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                                        Posted, 6th February 2012
                                        by bourbonphantom
                                        0
                                        22
                                        Andrew can pull apart pieces of a spider, and can pull teeth out of someone's mouth, but can't pull the disease out of his dying mother.
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                                        Posted, 11th February 2012
                                        by bourbonphantom
                                        0
                                        23
                                        If you need to pay for your mom's hospital bill just rob the gas station and three guys from your street
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                                          Posted, 16th February 2012
                                          by TheGodDamnBatman
                                          0
                                          24
                                          Nerds are more likely to flex their mental muscles than actually workout.
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                                            Posted, 30th August 2012
                                            by pikasneeze
                                            0
                                            25
                                            We put cameras in everything nowadays, don't we?
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                                              Posted, 30th August 2012
                                              by pikasneeze
                                              0
                                              26
                                              Juggling will make you super popular. Or knowing how to play jazz like in Spider-Man 3.
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                                                Posted, 30th August 2012
                                                by pikasneeze
                                                0
                                                27
                                                Deciding to chronicle everything from the beginning of the film but not really giving a good explanation is just as good as calling the film "Plothole."
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                                                  Posted, 30th August 2012
                                                  by pikasneeze
                                                  0
                                                  28
                                                  Apparently, there's a drought in the Central African Republic.
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                                                    Posted, 2nd November 2012
                                                    by Flesh and Blood
                                                    0
                                                    29
                                                    There goes the popular theory that young men who get super powers are going to use them for the betterment of society.
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                                                      Posted, 14th March 2013
                                                      by qwkslvr
                                                      0
                                                      30
                                                      So, a bunch of teenage boys get superpowers and don't ever try to use them to get teenages girls naked. How incredibly unrealistic!
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                                                        Posted, 9th August 2014
                                                        by AcesBabyAces
                                                        0
                                                        31
                                                        When you are in a car and falling from the Space Needle, the normal behavior is not stopping the filming.
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                                                          Posted, 21st November 2014
                                                          by Garga
                                                          0
                                                          32
                                                          If you want to pull a tooth out, do the lasso thing around the root, you know? Don't get them from the middle or it'll break.
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                                                            Posted, 21st November 2014
                                                            by Garga
                                                            0
                                                            33
                                                            Jump in the first hole you see in the ground. You may find something interesting waiting for you.
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                                                            • 21st November 2014 by Garga
                                                              If you are a lonely, abused nerdy teenager, forget the aforementioned hole. Just go continue to your miserable life.
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                                                            Posted, 21st November 2014
                                                            by Garga
                                                            0
                                                            34
                                                            Be careful when you're bullying the weak nerdy weird teenager who carries a camera in the school. He may pull your teeth with the lasso thingy in front of everyone.
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                                                              Posted, 21st November 2014
                                                              by Garga
                                                              0
                                                              35
                                                              When your weird friend tells you to leave him alone, do as he says or lightning will hit you.
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                                                                Posted, 21st November 2014
                                                                by Garga
                                                                0
                                                                36
                                                                Do not just wander around in the clouds, you'll crash with airplanes.
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                                                                  Posted, 21st November 2014
                                                                  by Garga
                                                                  0
                                                                  37
                                                                  Do not puke on chicks, specially older chicks with pink hair.
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                                                                    Posted, 21st November 2014
                                                                    by Garga
                                                                    0
                                                                    38
                                                                    You can be super popular in high school after you perform some tricks on the stage.
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                                                                      Posted, 21st November 2014
                                                                      by Garga
                                                                      0
                                                                      39
                                                                      Honking the car horn can be fatal.
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                                                                        Posted, 21st November 2014
                                                                        by Garga
                                                                        0
                                                                        40
                                                                        Do not forget to make a recording and say I LOVE YOU to your friend, after you kill him.
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                                                                          Posted, 21st November 2014
                                                                          by Garga
                                                                          0
                                                                          41
                                                                          If you have super powers and actually can FLY, you still have to have ropes and climbing tools when you are going to a mountain. Even if you flew around the globe to get there.
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                                                                            Posted, 21st November 2014
                                                                            by Garga
                                                                            0
                                                                            42
                                                                            Waitresses will freak out if you show them a picture of Virgin Mary in your pancake's syrup.
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                                                                              Posted, 21st November 2014
                                                                              by Garga
                                                                              0
                                                                              43
                                                                              Magic is so hot!
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                                                                                Posted, 21st November 2014
                                                                                by Garga
                                                                                0

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