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Pan

Pan
This list was started on 6th April 2016 by Garga
There are 21 learnings for this movie
This list was last updated on 6th April 2016

The Things I Learned . . .

1
Prophecy of a saviour is very hot these days in the Hollywood. They shove it in every reboot, sequel, prequel or remake. This time we have a fairy god impregnating a Mary, resulting in a Christ like child, fighting evil Palpatine with the help of Han-Jones hybrid and a white Princess Mononoke. I learnt subtlety in fact.
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    Posted, 6th April 2016
    by Garga
    1
    2
    If there's a prophecy regarding a chosen one child killing you and you find that child, the rule of villainy forbids you to kill the child. Throw him in a cell instead so he can escape and drag the story for another hour or so.
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      Posted, 6th April 2016
      by Garga
      1
      3
      Before leaving an infant on an orphanage's doorstep, google a few minutes to make sure it's not a Dickensian orphanage, for the sake of your infant, the Christ. I'm sure in the movie's concept of time, it's possible.
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        Posted, 6th April 2016
        by Garga
        0
        4
        The prequel of a story set in 1904 is happening during WWII. That's great storytelling.
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          Posted, 6th April 2016
          by Garga
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          5
          All religious people are evil, specially Christians. This time, nuns.
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            Posted, 6th April 2016
            by Garga
            0
            6
            Nobody cared about checking orphanages in the Britain during WWII. Nothing would happen if a bunch of kids were missing either.
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              Posted, 6th April 2016
              by Garga
              0
              7
              If you're an evil nun and secretly hoard foods off of an orphanage, don't stuff a giant pastry inside your mouth in full view of the orphans.
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                Posted, 6th April 2016
                by Garga
                0
                8
                Every orphanage needs a secret trapdoor which activates by pinching the Virgin Mary's statue.
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                  Posted, 6th April 2016
                  by Garga
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                  9
                  If you steal enough food from orphans and stash it inside a secret room, these foods eventually will turn into pirate gold coins chests.
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                    Posted, 6th April 2016
                    by Garga
                    0
                    10
                    The best time to snatch kids off their beds into a giant flying fucking pirate ship is during the London Blitz, when no one watches the skies during the night.
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                      Posted, 6th April 2016
                      by Garga
                      0
                      11
                      The rout to Neverland is past the second star on the right.
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                        Posted, 6th April 2016
                        by Garga
                        0
                        12
                        Fairy dust is in fact a mineral and can be mined. And I thought it's some kind of fairy shit or something.
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                          Posted, 6th April 2016
                          by Garga
                          0
                          13
                          Apparently there's a huge prize of nothing for any slave miner who finds a piece of fairy dust. No wonder they'll kill each-other to take credit for finding some.
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                            Posted, 6th April 2016
                            by Garga
                            0
                            14
                            The best test to see if someone is in fact a runaway slave miner and not a pirate is a fight between him, unarmed, and our best warrior. If he's skilled enough to win, it proves he's a miner, unskilled in combat and not a pirate warrior!
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                              Posted, 6th April 2016
                              by Garga
                              0
                              15
                              Fairies and Natives can't possibly unite and fight the tyranny of the pirates unless there's a chosen one to unite them. Or maybe they're too stupid and selfish to unite.
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                                Posted, 6th April 2016
                                by Garga
                                0
                                16
                                In the world post PotC: On stranger tides, if there's pirates in a movie, there are mermaids somewhere too. With a bit of hint in the soundtrack.
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                                  Posted, 6th April 2016
                                  by Garga
                                  0
                                  17
                                  Flame throwers only work one time against the fairies. On their second wave of attack you're screwed!
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                                    Posted, 6th April 2016
                                    by Garga
                                    0
                                    18
                                    Captain Hook hooked up with Tiger Lilly, rode to sunset and lived happily ever after 'cause there won't be any sequel to this bombed prequel.
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                                      Posted, 6th April 2016
                                      by Garga
                                      0
                                      19
                                      When someone is hurting your dear ones, beg him to stop and tell him you'll do anything and when he stopped, be a badass an don't give a fuck to whatever he says. It's not like he's in power and start doing whatever he does to cause you beg him, is it?
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                                        Posted, 6th April 2016
                                        by Garga
                                        0
                                        20
                                        Apparently Neverland is a floating island hovering above an ocean with bubbly pieces of ocean containing whales and dinosaurs floating near it. Dig the mine too much and you'll fell into the ocean where those animals eat you.
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                                          Posted, 6th April 2016
                                          by Garga
                                          0
                                          21
                                          Do I get to impersonate Peter Pan in Neverland if I carry a Frying Pan instead of a Pan Flute? Just one tiny unimportant detail of flying remains to solve and I'm good to go.
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                                            Posted, 6th April 2016
                                            by Garga
                                            0

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