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Jumper

Jumper
This list was started on 24th January 2010 by NateSean
There are 115 learnings for this movie
This list was last updated on 13th May 2015

The Things I Learned . . .

1
Jumpers are in great shape even though they don't walk.
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    Posted, 1st February 2010
    by bigsexy707
    9
    2
    If a bank is robbed on the same day a kid asks to use your bathroom, which consequently brings you past the location of the safe that you saw him eyeballing, don't bother looking into it.
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      Posted, 24th January 2010
      by NateSean
      8
      3
      Paladains are dedicated to wiping out all Jumpers but only one Jumper is dedicated to killing the Paladains.
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        Posted, 24th January 2010
        by NateSean
        7
        4
        Samuel L. Jackson just has no luck in a movie where Hayden Christensen plays the title character.
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          Posted, 24th January 2010
          by NateSean
          7
          5
          Someone can teleport from a river into a library, cause a minor flood, walk out and no one will question what just happened.
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            Posted, 29th January 2010
            by jimbob
            7
            6
            There is nothing wrong with dropping some poor London bus driver in the middle of the Egyptian desert, or a random fruit seller in the middle of a warzone in Chechnya.
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              Posted, 31st May 2010
              by thugz4real
              7
              7
              Being able to teleport yourself also gives you the ability to unlock chained gates (at the Colesseum) just because you teleported to the other side of the gate.
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                Posted, 31st May 2010
                by thugz4real
                7
                8
                A bank robbery takes ten years to investigate.
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                  Posted, 24th January 2010
                  by NateSean
                  6
                  9
                  The best place to catch a few rays of sun after surfing in Australia, has to be atop the sphinx's head in Egypt
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                  • 5th June 2010 by Mariabfoxy
                    Introducing "The triple U". Unfunny Uninspired and Unreadable. The jungle is mad at you miss TiffyG2133
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                  Posted, 26th January 2010
                  by TiffYG2133
                  6
                  10
                  After discovering that you're a Jumper in your teens, several years later you will have forgotten how to open doors.
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                    Posted, 8th March 2010
                    by PandasLikePoptarts
                    6
                    11
                    Padalins can create a glorified stun gun, but not give it enough juice to stop the jumper's heart right there.
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                      Posted, 31st May 2010
                      by thugz4real
                      6
                      12
                      When being chased by the bad guys your best course of action is to jump home scare the crap out of your dad, then go to the workplace of the girl you were in love with when you were 15 and are apparantly still in love with now leading said bad guys straight to them.
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                        Posted, 31st May 2010
                        by thugz4real
                        6
                        13
                        If a teenage boy falls into the icy river and is presumed dead, nobody will contact his father to tell him the bad news.
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                          Posted, 31st May 2010
                          by thugz4real
                          6
                          14
                          Apparently no one bothered to ask how a 15 year old kid got millions, or refused to give him a multimillion dollar apartment.
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                            Posted, 31st May 2010
                            by thugz4real
                            6
                            15
                            When you're hiding two feet away from a man who's trying to kill you and you spot a picture of your long-lost mother, you say out loud "Mom?"
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                              Posted, 31st May 2010
                              by thugz4real
                              6
                              16
                              There is no better way to advance the plot of the movie than have the main characters drive a Mercedes around Tokyo for NO REASON.
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                                Posted, 31st May 2010
                                by thugz4real
                                6
                                17
                                Your mother will have no problem working for an organization that deals in something very similar to genocide if it pays well.
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                                  Posted, 31st May 2010
                                  by thugz4real
                                  6
                                  18
                                  General Sci-Fi Subrule. If you have a super-power, there is ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS someone that knows EXACTLY how to counteract your super-power and generally wants to kill you. ALWAYS. (I mean, really? How the hell would they even catch the first jumper, since in the Middle Ages, electricity didn't exist? And they can...you know...TELEPORT. ANYWHERE.)
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                                    Posted, 31st May 2010
                                    by thugz4real
                                    6
                                    19
                                    Millie is gonna know how David looks like even though she has not seen him in like 8 yrs or so.
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                                      Posted, 31st May 2010
                                      by thugz4real
                                      6
                                      20
                                      It's impossible to be in banking because you flunked algebra 8 years ago because you know banking is all about solving for x and has NOTHING to do with interest or management or investing.
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                                        Posted, 31st May 2010
                                        by thugz4real
                                        6
                                        21
                                        Even though you have the ability to teleport anywhere, don't bother to arm yourself with any kind of weapon to save your girlfriend, even though you know your enemy is waiting for you, and you are outnumbered.
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                                          Posted, 31st May 2010
                                          by thugz4real
                                          5
                                          22
                                          The best way to repay the deeds of a guy who saved your life from two killers, let you stay in his room in refuge, and attempted to help you kill Roland is by tying him to an electric wire in the middle of a war.
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                                            Posted, 31st May 2010
                                            by thugz4real
                                            5
                                            23
                                            If you're thought to have drowned in an ice river, no one will ask how you survived, or what you have been doing 8 years later.
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                                              Posted, 31st May 2010
                                              by thugz4real
                                              5
                                              24
                                              Any time someone in a film says something "is impossible", count on the main character doing it at least once.
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                                                Posted, 31st May 2010
                                                by thugz4real
                                                5
                                                25
                                                If you belong to a super-secret organization that hunts and kills people with superpowers, your loyalty to that organization is more important than your loyalty to your own family.
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                                                  Posted, 31st May 2010
                                                  by thugz4real
                                                  5
                                                  26
                                                  Rather than teach your child how to use his powers and avoid being killed for reasons that are never fully explained, give him "a head start". It's more sporting.
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                                                    Posted, 31st May 2010
                                                    by thugz4real
                                                    5
                                                    27
                                                    Jumpers carry around Men in Black memory wipe pen thingys that automatically wipe the memory of the hundreds of people that see them teleport around on busy streets and other densely crowded areas.
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                                                      Posted, 31st May 2010
                                                      by thugz4real
                                                      5
                                                      28
                                                      Yes your sweetheart will conveniently have stayed in the exact same town for 8 years just ready for you to pick her up.
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                                                        Posted, 31st May 2010
                                                        by thugz4real
                                                        5
                                                        29
                                                        When having lunch on top of the Spynx, always have a lawn chair, a cooler and some Jimmy John's handy.
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                                                          Posted, 31st May 2010
                                                          by thugz4real
                                                          5
                                                          30
                                                          The umbrella really was necessary, as it ALWAYS rains in London.
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                                                            Posted, 31st May 2010
                                                            by thugz4real
                                                            5
                                                            31
                                                            When a shiny car jumps from one position to another in the middle of busy traffic, NOBODY notices, because presumably, all the other drivers look down to change the radio station at that exact moment ... each time.
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                                                              Posted, 31st May 2010
                                                              by thugz4real
                                                              5
                                                              32
                                                              Being teleported to a cave high in a mountain and being left there to most possibly die, apparently evokes the same emotion/facial reaction as when one just misses the bus. "Oh dagnag it ... oh well, I'll just wait for the next one."
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                                                                Posted, 31st May 2010
                                                                by thugz4real
                                                                5
                                                                33
                                                                If your mom has a problem with your brother being a Jumper, she probably won't approve of your vampire boyfriend. Or the werewolf for that matter.
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                                                                Posted, 24th January 2010
                                                                by NateSean
                                                                4
                                                                34
                                                                A lair that looks like a cave is not a cave, it's a lair.
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                                                                  Posted, 9th February 2010
                                                                  by Sassy
                                                                  4
                                                                  35
                                                                  If you discover you have groovy super-human powers at the age of 13 you will waste the next seven years of your life using this power to go "sight seeing."
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                                                                    Posted, 31st May 2010
                                                                    by thugz4real
                                                                    4
                                                                    36
                                                                    Taking a holiday to Rome with your best girl is such a great idea especially when the weird guy with the white hair is trying to kill you.
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                                                                      Posted, 31st May 2010
                                                                      by thugz4real
                                                                      4
                                                                      37
                                                                      Taking a deep breath is the only way to relieve yourself from the dizziness of jumping.
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                                                                        Posted, 31st May 2010
                                                                        by thugz4real
                                                                        4
                                                                        38
                                                                        When someone asks you for an explanation of what's going on, you just stay quiet and pant annoyingly until they shake the hell out of you.
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                                                                          Posted, 31st May 2010
                                                                          by thugz4real
                                                                          4
                                                                          39
                                                                          After robbing millions of dollars from various banks, all you have to do to waylay your conscience is write corny "IOU" notes, which you keep in your apartment and never intend to honor.
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                                                                            Posted, 31st May 2010
                                                                            by thugz4real
                                                                            4
                                                                            40
                                                                            If you have fallen the full height of the Empire State Building a municipal pool will be sufficient to break your fall.
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                                                                              Posted, 31st May 2010
                                                                              by thugz4real
                                                                              4
                                                                              41
                                                                              If you can teleport literally anywhere in the world and someone is trying to kill you, rather than teleport as far away from them as possible, go underground, and disappear for a while, you should go straight to your childhood home and get as many of your childhood friends involved as possible.
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                                                                                Posted, 31st May 2010
                                                                                by thugz4real
                                                                                4
                                                                                42
                                                                                Instead of killing the man who killed your father, intends to kill you, and attempted to kill your girlfriend, when you get the chance, its best to jump him to the grand canyon for a free exotic tour because 'you're different after all'.
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                                                                                  Posted, 31st May 2010
                                                                                  by thugz4real
                                                                                  4
                                                                                  43
                                                                                  When in trouble, there's no better place to escape to than your friendly public library.
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                                                                                    Posted, 31st May 2010
                                                                                    by thugz4real
                                                                                    4
                                                                                    44
                                                                                    Only God should have the power to be everywhere. The Paladins, though, should be allowed to have the power to follow the Jumpers everywhere.
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                                                                                      Posted, 31st May 2010
                                                                                      by thugz4real
                                                                                      4
                                                                                      45
                                                                                      Rather then jumping into the apartment, rescuing the girl, and leaving BIG bomb behind, it's better to drop off the bomb at some national monument where it will destroy said monument.
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                                                                                        Posted, 31st May 2010
                                                                                        by thugz4real
                                                                                        4
                                                                                        46
                                                                                        When you see someone else pissing in the Colosseum after closing don't ask who they are or why they're there.
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                                                                                          Posted, 31st May 2010
                                                                                          by thugz4real
                                                                                          4
                                                                                          47
                                                                                          When returning home soaking wet and your father asks what happened to you in a concerned tone and manner, teleport away and stay away from home for years on end. How dare your single father show genuine concern for your well-being!
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                                                                                            Posted, 9th September 2010
                                                                                            by KungFuMasterLarry
                                                                                            4
                                                                                            48
                                                                                            While investigating a bank robbery, the detectives involved won't pay attention to reports of other banks being robbed in a similar fashion.
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                                                                                              Posted, 24th January 2010
                                                                                              by NateSean
                                                                                              3
                                                                                              49
                                                                                              Everyone accepts cash in suspicious amounts these days with no questions asked.
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                                                                                                Posted, 24th January 2010
                                                                                                by NateSean
                                                                                                3
                                                                                                50
                                                                                                Yes, you can watch a 9 minute trailer of a movie and still won't miss much.
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                                                                                                • 19th June 2015 by Xynauzer
                                                                                                  You would be good at Cinema Sins
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                                                                                                Posted, 31st May 2010
                                                                                                by thugz4real
                                                                                                3
                                                                                                51
                                                                                                When you meet a guy you used to love who is supposed to have been dead for the past 8 years and didn't say anything to you in that bar, you immediately agree to go to Rome with him that very day, no questions asked.
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                                                                                                  Posted, 31st May 2010
                                                                                                  by thugz4real
                                                                                                  3
                                                                                                  52
                                                                                                  Opening doorknobs is something that one will forget how to do if they haven't used one in a while.
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                                                                                                    Posted, 31st May 2010
                                                                                                    by thugz4real
                                                                                                    3
                                                                                                    53
                                                                                                    Samuel L. can do no wrong.
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                                                                                                      Posted, 31st May 2010
                                                                                                      by thugz4real
                                                                                                      3
                                                                                                      54
                                                                                                      In a crowded bar, no one will notice if you suddenly jump 20 feet.
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                                                                                                        Posted, 31st May 2010
                                                                                                        by thugz4real
                                                                                                        3
                                                                                                        55
                                                                                                        Good effects don't make up for bad acting. Actually, I knew that already. I just like saying it.
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                                                                                                          Posted, 31st May 2010
                                                                                                          by thugz4real
                                                                                                          3
                                                                                                          56
                                                                                                          The white haired guy will keep your girlfriend with him as bait, but will merely beat up your father until in critical condition then leave him unsupervised long enough for you to sneak in and jump him to the hospital.
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                                                                                                            Posted, 31st May 2010
                                                                                                            by thugz4real
                                                                                                            3
                                                                                                            57
                                                                                                            When you rob banks/teleport in a public location that has cameras. You never wear a mask and your face just happens to never been seen on camera ANYWHERE.
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                                                                                                              Posted, 31st May 2010
                                                                                                              by thugz4real
                                                                                                              3
                                                                                                              58
                                                                                                              Snow globes are, apparently, unbreakable.
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                                                                                                                Posted, 31st May 2010
                                                                                                                by thugz4real
                                                                                                                3
                                                                                                                59
                                                                                                                Library books and ice water from a pond don't mix.
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                                                                                                                  Posted, 31st May 2010
                                                                                                                  by thugz4real
                                                                                                                  3
                                                                                                                  60
                                                                                                                  The jumpers just need to carry a gun, end of story.
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                                                                                                                    Posted, 18th June 2012
                                                                                                                    by catmunch
                                                                                                                    3
                                                                                                                    61
                                                                                                                    Don't ever pick on someone when growing up because 10 or so yrs later they will comeback and mess you up and get revenge.
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                                                                                                                      Posted, 31st May 2010
                                                                                                                      by thugz4real
                                                                                                                      2
                                                                                                                      62
                                                                                                                      You will risk your life and walk across a frozen lake for a snowglobe.
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                                                                                                                        Posted, 31st May 2010
                                                                                                                        by thugz4real
                                                                                                                        2
                                                                                                                        63
                                                                                                                        A fifteen year-old can rent a room in New York in the same building that Tom Hanks stayed in Big.
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                                                                                                                          Posted, 13th August 2010
                                                                                                                          by NateSean
                                                                                                                          2
                                                                                                                          64
                                                                                                                          Inspite of the obvious lack of a generator it's possible to run electricity into a catacomb in the middle of the desert.
                                                                                                                          (1) Comments
                                                                                                                          • 26th January 2010 by TiffYG2133
                                                                                                                            I do believe you see the generators outside, they're cover by some desert camo blankets
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                                                                                                                          Posted, 24th January 2010
                                                                                                                          by NateSean
                                                                                                                          1
                                                                                                                          65
                                                                                                                          Samuel L. Jackson tears down walls when enraged.
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                                                                                                                            Posted, 6th February 2010
                                                                                                                            by Evilgidgit
                                                                                                                            1
                                                                                                                            66
                                                                                                                            Jumpers are very private about their "hunting Paladains" lair so keep out.
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                                                                                                                              Posted, 9th February 2010
                                                                                                                              by Sassy
                                                                                                                              1
                                                                                                                              67
                                                                                                                              If your mother is a Paladin and you're a jumper, she'll give you a head start.
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                                                                                                                                Posted, 16th March 2010
                                                                                                                                by tenshi
                                                                                                                                1
                                                                                                                                68
                                                                                                                                It's mindless to use the super-machine throughout the entire movie -- just at the climax.
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                                                                                                                                  Posted, 16th March 2010
                                                                                                                                  by Kikkomannrice
                                                                                                                                  1
                                                                                                                                  69
                                                                                                                                  If you're a 13 year old actor playing the "younger" version of a 20 year old actor, don't worry, they'll fix it using digital effects.
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                                                                                                                                    Posted, 31st May 2010
                                                                                                                                    by thugz4real
                                                                                                                                    1
                                                                                                                                    70
                                                                                                                                    Movie makers like to screw perfectly good books over. Oh, wait... i already knew that...
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                                                                                                                                      Posted, 20th July 2010
                                                                                                                                      by Lena
                                                                                                                                      1
                                                                                                                                      71
                                                                                                                                      It takes eight years for water damage in a library to get fixed.
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                                                                                                                                        Posted, 20th July 2010
                                                                                                                                        by Lena
                                                                                                                                        1
                                                                                                                                        72
                                                                                                                                        "You are an abomination." No, Samuel L Jackson, your white hair is an abomination.
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                                                                                                                                          Posted, 10th September 2010
                                                                                                                                          by avalanche719
                                                                                                                                          1
                                                                                                                                          73
                                                                                                                                          After watching some helpless people in a flood on the news, your first thought will be "Well guess I'll go hook up with some chick in London."
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                                                                                                                                            Posted, 10th September 2010
                                                                                                                                            by avalanche719
                                                                                                                                            1
                                                                                                                                            74
                                                                                                                                            The pub you visit in London will be the exact pub that another jumper is drinking in, even though he could be ANYWHERE else.
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                                                                                                                                              Posted, 10th September 2010
                                                                                                                                              by avalanche719
                                                                                                                                              1
                                                                                                                                              75
                                                                                                                                              It's not strange at all to have the NSA show up to investigate a bank robbery.
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                                                                                                                                                Posted, 10th September 2010
                                                                                                                                                by avalanche719
                                                                                                                                                1
                                                                                                                                                76
                                                                                                                                                The girl you had a crush on in high school is kind of a slut.
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                                                                                                                                                  Posted, 10th September 2010
                                                                                                                                                  by avalanche719
                                                                                                                                                  1
                                                                                                                                                  77
                                                                                                                                                  The best way to get into a girl's pants is to fulfill her childhood wish.
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                                                                                                                                                    Posted, 10th September 2010
                                                                                                                                                    by avalanche719
                                                                                                                                                    1
                                                                                                                                                    78
                                                                                                                                                    You're a pretty lame bully if the best nickname you have for someone is "ricebowl"
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                                                                                                                                                      Posted, 10th September 2010
                                                                                                                                                      by avalanche719
                                                                                                                                                      1
                                                                                                                                                      79
                                                                                                                                                      Everyone wants to blow people to Timbuktu, I feel bad for those Timbuktuians.
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                                                                                                                                                        Posted, 10th September 2010
                                                                                                                                                        by avalanche719
                                                                                                                                                        1
                                                                                                                                                        80
                                                                                                                                                        If you have the ability to teleport and you need money, be sure to rob a lot of banks. No need to rob a mob boss or a spoiled rich asshole instead.
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                                                                                                                                                          Posted, 11th February 2011
                                                                                                                                                          by AKenjiB
                                                                                                                                                          1
                                                                                                                                                          81
                                                                                                                                                          Be sure to leave a person that knows who you are in a bank which you just robbed.
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                                                                                                                                                          • 26th March 2012 by bourbonphantom
                                                                                                                                                            Yes this was totally a stupid move. But not as stupid as trying to go reconnect with the hognosed girl working at the bar in douchetown.
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                                                                                                                                                          Posted, 25th March 2012
                                                                                                                                                          by qwkslvr
                                                                                                                                                          1
                                                                                                                                                          82
                                                                                                                                                          Why didn't they just carry a weapon to take out Samuel Jackson?
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                                                                                                                                                            Posted, 28th September 2012
                                                                                                                                                            by catmunch1
                                                                                                                                                            1
                                                                                                                                                            83
                                                                                                                                                            If you find out the Jumper you're hunting is the son of your co-worker, there's no need to immediately go and confront your co-worker about her hiding that fact.
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                                                                                                                                                              Posted, 17th June 2014
                                                                                                                                                              by ilearnedalot
                                                                                                                                                              1
                                                                                                                                                              84
                                                                                                                                                              If you teleport a room from your building into a river to escape, you necessarily have to teleport the whole room into the library to escape the river.
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                                                                                                                                                                Posted, 17th June 2014
                                                                                                                                                                by ilearnedalot
                                                                                                                                                                1
                                                                                                                                                                85
                                                                                                                                                                When you're trapped on the wall by a web of electrified wire, your girlfriend will be able to set you free with one single snip of a wire cutter.
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                                                                                                                                                                  Posted, 17th June 2014
                                                                                                                                                                  by ilearnedalot
                                                                                                                                                                  1
                                                                                                                                                                  86
                                                                                                                                                                  If you're a Paladin hunting a jumper in Rome, it's far more dramatic to catch him at the Colosseum than at the hotel he and his girlfriend have checked into.
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                                                                                                                                                                    Posted, 17th June 2014
                                                                                                                                                                    by ilearnedalot
                                                                                                                                                                    1
                                                                                                                                                                    87
                                                                                                                                                                    I'd like to learn how Paladins fought jumpers in medieval times without those techs. Not an easy task, eh?
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                                                                                                                                                                      Posted, 13th May 2015
                                                                                                                                                                      by Garga
                                                                                                                                                                      1
                                                                                                                                                                      88
                                                                                                                                                                      If you a jumper, your hide-out is called a lair, not a cave.
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                                                                                                                                                                        Posted, 16th March 2010
                                                                                                                                                                        by tenshi
                                                                                                                                                                        0
                                                                                                                                                                        89
                                                                                                                                                                        Leaving out parts of the truth is better than lying.
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                                                                                                                                                                          Posted, 16th March 2010
                                                                                                                                                                          by tenshi
                                                                                                                                                                          0
                                                                                                                                                                          90
                                                                                                                                                                          When you're a jumper, walking makes you feel normal.
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                                                                                                                                                                            Posted, 16th March 2010
                                                                                                                                                                            by tenshi
                                                                                                                                                                            0
                                                                                                                                                                            91
                                                                                                                                                                            It's perfectly acceptable to steal a NYPD motorcycle for no apparent reason other than decoration.
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                                                                                                                                                                              Posted, 10th September 2010
                                                                                                                                                                              by avalanche719
                                                                                                                                                                              0
                                                                                                                                                                              92
                                                                                                                                                                              If your computer desk has been moved, get the f*ck out!
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                                                                                                                                                                                Posted, 10th September 2010
                                                                                                                                                                                by avalanche719
                                                                                                                                                                                0
                                                                                                                                                                                93
                                                                                                                                                                                After a one-night stand, you just gotta go surfing.
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                                                                                                                                                                                  Posted, 10th September 2010
                                                                                                                                                                                  by avalanche719
                                                                                                                                                                                  0
                                                                                                                                                                                  94
                                                                                                                                                                                  David has invented the 'surf of shame'
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                                                                                                                                                                                    Posted, 10th September 2010
                                                                                                                                                                                    by avalanche719
                                                                                                                                                                                    0
                                                                                                                                                                                    95
                                                                                                                                                                                    If you're planning on leaving a girl in the middle of the night after banging her, don't leave clothes right by her side of the bed.
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                                                                                                                                                                                      Posted, 10th September 2010
                                                                                                                                                                                      by avalanche719
                                                                                                                                                                                      0
                                                                                                                                                                                      96
                                                                                                                                                                                      If a girl questioned my staring at her for a specified amount of time, I'd tell her "well b*tch, walking up and talking to someone works both ways, peace out" and then leave.
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                                                                                                                                                                                        Posted, 10th September 2010
                                                                                                                                                                                        by avalanche719
                                                                                                                                                                                        0
                                                                                                                                                                                        97
                                                                                                                                                                                        The walls of expensive NYC penthouses aren't very thick.
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                                                                                                                                                                                          Posted, 10th September 2010
                                                                                                                                                                                          by avalanche719
                                                                                                                                                                                          0
                                                                                                                                                                                          98
                                                                                                                                                                                          If you are thrown off your balcony, you'll land on your furniture. Always.
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                                                                                                                                                                                            Posted, 10th September 2010
                                                                                                                                                                                            by avalanche719
                                                                                                                                                                                            0
                                                                                                                                                                                            99
                                                                                                                                                                                            I'd really hate to be one of the passengers on the bus that got jumped to the middle of the desert.
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                                                                                                                                                                                              Posted, 10th September 2010
                                                                                                                                                                                              by avalanche719
                                                                                                                                                                                              0
                                                                                                                                                                                              100
                                                                                                                                                                                              If your job is to kill jumpers and you find one, just have a chat with him when you surprise him at home. Don't ambush him or anything to make your job easier.
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                                                                                                                                                                                                Posted, 10th September 2010
                                                                                                                                                                                                by avalanche719
                                                                                                                                                                                                0
                                                                                                                                                                                                101
                                                                                                                                                                                                You're going to have to cleanse yourself in the ocean after banging a chick from London.
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                                                                                                                                                                                                  Posted, 10th September 2010
                                                                                                                                                                                                  by avalanche719
                                                                                                                                                                                                  0
                                                                                                                                                                                                  102
                                                                                                                                                                                                  Don't forget to tip your usher.
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                                                                                                                                                                                                    Posted, 10th September 2010
                                                                                                                                                                                                    by avalanche719
                                                                                                                                                                                                    0
                                                                                                                                                                                                    103
                                                                                                                                                                                                    Apparently, Jumpers always go bad.
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                                                                                                                                                                                                      Posted, 10th September 2010
                                                                                                                                                                                                      by avalanche719
                                                                                                                                                                                                      0
                                                                                                                                                                                                      104
                                                                                                                                                                                                      As a jumper, you can claim you're different all you want yet you still steal money from across the globe and don't pay any taxes.
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                                                                                                                                                                                                        Posted, 10th September 2010
                                                                                                                                                                                                        by avalanche719
                                                                                                                                                                                                        0
                                                                                                                                                                                                        105
                                                                                                                                                                                                        There's a nice shark pit around Cuba.
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                                                                                                                                                                                                          Posted, 10th September 2010
                                                                                                                                                                                                          by avalanche719
                                                                                                                                                                                                          0
                                                                                                                                                                                                          106
                                                                                                                                                                                                          Why would you bother getting the digits from a Polish girl in Rio? Just bang her and leave, not like you're going to jump into her another time.
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                                                                                                                                                                                                            Posted, 10th September 2010
                                                                                                                                                                                                            by avalanche719
                                                                                                                                                                                                            0
                                                                                                                                                                                                            107
                                                                                                                                                                                                            A guy peeing in a big colliseum is not a fashion show.
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                                                                                                                                                                                                              Posted, 10th September 2010
                                                                                                                                                                                                              by avalanche719
                                                                                                                                                                                                              0
                                                                                                                                                                                                              108
                                                                                                                                                                                                              Instead of just killing the paladins in your lair, make sure you say that you're different and allow them time to assess your flamethrower.
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                                                                                                                                                                                                                Posted, 10th September 2010
                                                                                                                                                                                                                by avalanche719
                                                                                                                                                                                                                0
                                                                                                                                                                                                                109
                                                                                                                                                                                                                I'm not arming a bomb, I'm thinking about going bowling.
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                                                                                                                                                                                                                  Posted, 10th September 2010
                                                                                                                                                                                                                  by avalanche719
                                                                                                                                                                                                                  0
                                                                                                                                                                                                                  110
                                                                                                                                                                                                                  Mercedes dealers in Tokyo sell cars with steering wheels on the left side.
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                                                                                                                                                                                                                    Posted, 13th May 2015
                                                                                                                                                                                                                    by Garga
                                                                                                                                                                                                                    0
                                                                                                                                                                                                                    111
                                                                                                                                                                                                                    A Mercedes coupe weighs two tons, easy.
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                                                                                                                                                                                                                      Posted, 13th May 2015
                                                                                                                                                                                                                      by Garga
                                                                                                                                                                                                                      0
                                                                                                                                                                                                                      112
                                                                                                                                                                                                                      Try to show religious people as nut jobs and bad guys even in the most irrelevant circumstances.
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                                                                                                                                                                                                                        Posted, 13th May 2015
                                                                                                                                                                                                                        by Garga
                                                                                                                                                                                                                        0
                                                                                                                                                                                                                        113
                                                                                                                                                                                                                        Big Ben chimes on 8:30 like it's a full hour.
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                                                                                                                                                                                                                          Posted, 13th May 2015
                                                                                                                                                                                                                          by Garga
                                                                                                                                                                                                                          0
                                                                                                                                                                                                                          114
                                                                                                                                                                                                                          There are girls on this planet who will become far uglier than when they are teens and during puberty.
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                                                                                                                                                                                                                            Posted, 13th May 2015
                                                                                                                                                                                                                            by Garga
                                                                                                                                                                                                                            0

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