How to get FREE Long Distance calls on your cell phone:
1. Get a gum wrapper and place it over your phone.
2. Whistle into the Gum Wrapper.
3. Mash the keypad.
4. Voila! You know have free long distance. (0) Comments
You can melt a metal chain and burn your hand by briefly touching a plutonium core but still manage to later carry it 2 feet, pull it up a 8ft ladder with one hand and carry it another 5ft and not have the urge to let go. (0) Comments
When the Government is about to activate a weapon that will destroy your ship and kill everyone in it and you come up with a plan to stop them and save the world, there's still time for a cigarette before you explain the plan to your crew-mates. (0) Comments
It is necessary to label your folders as top secret in your own file cabinet. This is probobly done with the hope that if someone breaks into your office to snoop at files, they will not look at that one. (0) Comments
People will not start to panic and create mass hysteria about the end of the world after over thirty unexplained deaths at the same instant, a swarm of berserker pidgeons attacking London, an unexplained shuttle crash-landing, the complete obliteration of Rome by an unimaginably powerful thunderstorm and the collapse of the Golden-Gate Bridge all in the space of three months. (1) Comments
Although they have to travel through thousands of miles of rock to get to the core, it somehow makes sense to transport the whole ship and launching system to the north Pacific to save having to dig through an extra few miles. (1) Comments
Y'know what? I just saw this flic once more and noticed it too...They were in such a hurry but propably spend a lot of time and resources to bring that ship on that special built oil rig instead of starting right away in the desert where it has been built.
When faced with a computer that won't allow you to eject a compartment that isn't damaged, the only solution is to sacrifice the builder to hit the manual override instead of having the builder send a false failure signal to the computer. (0) Comments
If an astronaut is "just not ready" to make a manual emergency landing of a shuttle, then they absolutely shouldn't do so even if the only other alternative is to let the shuttle crash and kill everyone aboard. (0) Comments
Deep sea divers need to wear enourmous suits to withstand the pressure in the ocean, but when traveling to the center of the earth all you need is a leather jacket and some cool looking helmets. (0) Comments
Whether or not we acually have a magnetic field isn't really that important to our survival. Other than a bunch of disappointed boyscouts there will be no problem if we just lose our magnetic field. (1) Comments
Female astronauts also are always ignored by the belligerent captain when they automagically come up with directions on their own from a map of an area where they weren't going to land in the first place. (0) Comments
Military secrecy requires the use of world-famous personnel from non-military institutions like NASA and universities, who spontaneously become US military personnel, to conduct ubersecret missions. (0) Comments
You can burn a hole through the surface of the earth into the mantle but clearly you don't need to worry about reflux of magma through the hole (no artificial volcanoes, oh well). Guess all those megatonnes of rock sorta packs to the side or something too (miners take note). (0) Comments
While the Earth is in crisis, the populations of the world go on shopping, chatting in bars and cafes, to work, to school and football games, and in general act is if nothing is amiss-as long as there are no cheap special effect 'disasters' nearby to distract them. (0) Comments
It takes days to get to the core but only a few minutes to return-with whales joyously greeting you-and then giving away your location to an already-in-place Navy rescue armada-with a 15 year old kid in command. (0) Comments
On the mission that would decide the fate of the world and with unlimited resources, the great wise world leaders send two space pilots (one with limited experience in commanding), two theoretical scientists (one totally unknown) and two guys who are apparently there only for diversity: a Frenchman and a black guy. (0) Comments
A guy dumb enough to use phrases as absurd as "the first one" when asked if he is a certain person, yes or no? and "there's nothing on the right of the equals sign" when no conclusion has been reached is the only person in the world capable of figuring out that the Earth's core has stopped spinning. (0) Comments